Part of the Path of Immortality
The fedora man examined the book with curiosity, he had heard about it, La Verdadera Historia de la Conquista de la Nueva Espana, a book originally written by Hernan Cortez which was eventually admonished to someone called Bernal Diaz del Castillo, whoever that was he could not remember him from his days with the Conquistadores.
The fedora man examined the book with curiosity, he had heard about it, La Verdadera Historia de la Conquista de la Nueva Espana, a book originally written by Hernan Cortez which was eventually admonished to someone called Bernal Diaz del Castillo, whoever that was he could not remember him from his days with the Conquistadores.
This version of the book hid more than half the horrible details he had to go through in order to survive in the jungles of what is now known as Mexico, not only him, now that he remembered, but all those brave and foolish men who followed Captain Cortez in search for glory in the name of Charles I and God, the Catholic God.
He closed the book and sighed, nothing of value he could rescue from it, he needed to find the original and it was probably safeguarded by the Jesuits or the Freemasons, remembering, for him at least, was hard and it became harder with every passing year as his memory eroded through the infinity of his subconscious and eventually disappeared from sight, only reachable when he dreamed and traveled throughout the Dream World, the 4th Dimension, and witnessed some of the ancient cities, towns, battlefields and personalities, a flood of memories would come to him and if he was lucky enough then maybe he could pull the right memory, just maybe.
Being immortal had advantages, at first it looks great, but eventually, when one realizes what the disadvantages are and how, slowly, your mind starts to deteriorate, losing all purpose or sense of questing for knowledge, power or love it becomes senseless to be immortal.
"I lusted for this" The Fedora man adjusted his hat and looked over the emerald fields towards the setting sun "I wanted it, everyone does, and now that I have it I regret it so much, in so many ways, that I can't begin to enunciate them"
Slowly he sat down and observed the sun with obsession.
"I can't recall when was the last time seeing the sun setting was such a joy, it thrilled me, I remember that, it was always the victory over darkness, that terrible mantle that adorns us while we twitch and tremble in our beds" He removed his leather gloves and with his right hand caressed the grass next to him. "I used to enjoy the grass, its color, cloth, I remember enjoying the ingenuity with which they created fascinating pieces, embedded with beautiful art, the colors, flashing royally and the excitement of conquering the heart of others, a quest to settle in the heart of women for the rest of your life, to make new friends, find new civilizations, learn their tongue and traditions, to see the world through the eyes of someone else..."
Slowly he pulled some grass and pressed it hard onto his hand, he continued this process a few more times until he left a small hole where he could sit his hand without having to touch the grass.
"I remember life used to be worth something, don't get me wrong I'm not crazy just because, I'm not exactly mad, it's just a common misunderstanding to call me as such when there is nothing wrong with me except for my mind slowly drifting away from more than eight centuries of being alive and then, knowing that you can't die, you lose the thrill of everything. Afraid of dying, no, I have always lied about that, I am not afraid of dying I am just paranoid when I see creatures beyond my understanding, knowing that I can turn to dust and then come back is the icing on the top of the cake, they, the anti-gods, should destroy me and I have always let them believe that but that is a lie, I will come back, in horrible pain but I will be back"
"What terrible world is this in which one can find himself not able to die and not truly alive, just as H.P. Lovecraft said that even with strange aeons death may die... how can death die, is it really possible for me to see the end of all and a new beginning, no, I refuse, I rather see everything around me turn to ashes than to witness that first, maybe, just maybe, I'll earn the wrath of one of the Gods and finally I will earn my death"
The Fedora man stood up slowly as he witnessed the end of race, the sun finally defeated by the terrible night, sheer darkness taking hold of everything, no stars, a faint bloody red moon coming into sight.
"One day I'll witness the end of it all and I'll be more than glad if I am responsible for it"
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