Thursday, February 4, 2016

Relation 14

I've always wondered if it is me
Or if somehow society failed me
I don't know and I've stopped caring
The world seems bleak and doomed
Kept wondering how long I could walk
Or run, or crawl, to hide and die
Not much to do, not much to think
Just laying down won't do the trick
Neither love is my specialty, crude, too honest
Can't hold the ball for too long, lost interest
Was it something that broke in me
Am I that lost that I know not what love is?
Silly me, I only know the pain of sloth
And wrath, and gluttony, and nothing
How I wish sometimes for the searing to end
To devour the world set ablaze by myself
And if I could lose it all, I would do it
With a gun in me head, one shot to see the end
Not that I expect to be saved
Lost faith and more through years and years
To think it could not hurt me anymore
Was too ignorant of myself, I've lived this all along
If I could ever write well, or draw, or sing, or play
I would be the very best, the one to make the switch
But I could care less, my name will never be atoned
Only after a century gone will I earn my reputation
Words make more and more sense as time passes
I sometimes hear the secret that Foucault talked about
In me lays the silver key, the great lining for a brighter future
No, I will not deliver it to anyone, you try and decipher this
Because I want this to crumble first, to see it burn
To hear it cringe under its own weight, to let loose a scream
Of agony, of retarded ambivalent buttfuckery
I swear, if I could fuck everything that walked
I wished, that I could drink everything there is
I hope, I could smoke everything to be
I want, to see everything belonging
I will, destroy your preconceptions
From my throne I see the double headed eagle of lagash
The four colors of the cross, the great rose that sooths it
The pelican mother and her sacrifice for her children
By right I will deliver, because I am
God, and you
My sacred right

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